For lack of wanting to make an excuse, my basic reason for not blogging has been a lack of Internet access. As this year comes to an end, it pretty much means that it's time to reflect and recap what 2010 has really been all about.
Transition, transition, transition.
The year started off very rocky for me to say the least. I moved back in with my parents despite all of the conflicts that I've had with them in my lifetime. They, at first were neither here nor there, not supportive nor un-supportive of my choices. I returned back a different person, married, struggling financially, unemployed, a student, and with more exposed tattoos besides the small star on my finger I left my home with.
Besides the obvious physical changes, I came returned with strong differences emotionally and mentally. No longer was I that party girl, always hanging out with friends, always spending money on material possessions, drinking, doing drugs, being who I wanted to be. I returned a shell of that person, going to school part time struggling to finish with all A's. Most of the first couple of months were lonely, I found myself alone at home without any interaction with the outer world besides 4 days of school.
Sheltered again, this time by my own will. I did a lot of soul searching trying to decipher what I wanted out of life, what I wanted out of my marriage, and what I would do to make these things a reality. My relationship with Adrian was changing very rapidly, spending most of our time together for the last 9 months had proven that we were happy and that we had a lot of things to fix in our relationship respectively. Being separated from my husband proved to be a lot harder than I had anticipated. The months that we spent apart were filled with endless nights of crying, a lot of anger and frustration, and a lot of driving back and forth from south east Dallas to Frisco.
There wasn't much of a fuss over me finally finishing school and graduation came and went without my attendance to it. Graduating only meant that I'd have to repay all of my fees for going over my school contract, taking more certification tests, and paying a lot more to the great state of Texas to qualify for work. I passed my tests with flying colors, paid my dues, and received my licence in June, five months after graduation.
Eventually after many talks, many compromises, and a lot of driving, Adrian and I moved back in together. I wasn't the only one moving in with my parents, the summer brought my sister back home as well and her husband, and two infants. I'm not a baby person, I figure maybe one day I will be a good mother, but I do not want to be witness to other peoples parenting techniques or lack thereof. The rest of the year was a struggle just having to listen to my sisters family, noise is my enemy and infants yelling will take me from calm to furious in about 2 seconds.
I just don't like hearing screaming, end of story.
